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Written by Administrator
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ONE
We
come together because we believe that every child deserves a loving,
committed and responsible father. Not just the lucky ones, but every
child. We come together from across the nation and across the political
spectrum, all dedicated to ending the curse of fatherlessness that is
maiming our children and coarsening our society. We come together,
inspired by the best of the American tradition, ready to declare our
goal and seek the support of our fellow citizens. We come together to
call for a fatherhood movement.
We
come together as men and women, black and white, rich and poor, all
committed to restoring the institution of loving fatherhood as the
birthright of every child, the sure expectation of every mother, and
the joyful obligation of every man who helps to bring a baby into this
world.
We
come together as liberal and conservative, and from every region of our
nation, all believing that what divides us is far less important than
what unites us. We come together as Catholics, Protestants, Jews, and
Muslims, all asking for God's blessing and guidance, and all pledging
our time, our energy, and our best ideas to achieving the great task
before us.
We
come together knowing that our journey will be difficult, but knowing
we can do no other. For, whatever its other advantages, a society in
which large and growing numbers of adult males cease to nurture their
offspring is a failing society. Unless we reverse the trend of
fatherlessness, no other set of accomplishments will arrest our social
decay.
We come together to give life and energy
to a fatherhood movement.
TWO
We
view fatherlessness as one of the greatest social evils of our
generation. It is a principal cause of deteriorating child well-being
in our society. It is also an engine driving our worst social problems,
from crime and teen pregnancy to child poverty and domestic
violence.
Today's mass
separation of American fathers from their children is historically
unprecedented. Never before in our nation's history - never before in
any nation's history - have so many men been so radically estranged
from their children and from the mothers of their children. Never
before have so many children grown up without knowing what it means to
have a father. Never before has the "father's name" on so many birth
certificates been left blank.
Americans
are increasingly familiar with the grim statistics of fatherlessness.
Today, nearly 40 percent of all American children do not live with
their fathers. Before they reach age 18, more than half of all U.S.
children will spend at least a significant part of their childhood
living apart from their fathers.
This
astonishing absence - this large and growing hole in our society where
fathers ought to be - stems demographically from two related behaviors:
unwed childbearing and divorce. Today, never-married mothers and the
males who impregnate them account for one of every three babies born.
And though divorce rates have declined somewhat since the late 1980s,
the United States remains by far the most divorcing society in the
world. The result of these trends is the weakening of marriage and the
loss of fatherhood for millions of families.
For
at least the past decade, Americans have engaged in a loud and often
needlessly polarizing debate over "the family" and "family values."
Much of this debate has centered on the issue of family structure:
whether or not the steady defection of fathers, and the resulting
proliferation of mother-headed homes, amounts to a social crisis, a
legitimate cause for alarm.
While
we come from various points along America's political spectrum, we
agree on one central point: the family debate of the past decade is
over. It is over because everyone, or at least almost everyone, now
realizes that fathers matter. Not just a little, or in some
circumstances; but a lot, for every child. Increasingly, all our
studies concur, all our experiences show, the spread of fatherlessness
in our generation is a profound social crisis and a legitimate cause
for alarm.
The
question, then, is no longer whether we have a problem. The question
today is what, if anything, we are prepared to do about the problem.
What we intend to do is express our commitment to giving life and
energy to a fatherhood movement.
THREE
We
seek a fatherhood movement that is broadly based, overcoming barriers
of income, race, and politics, represented by many voices and
organizations, active at every level of our society. We seek a
fatherhood movement that is united by one idea: for every child, a
loving, committed and responsible father.
We
seek a fatherhood movement that demands and teaches higher standards of
male responsibility for children and higher standards of male
accountability to mothers. We seek a fatherhood movement premised upon
equal regard between men and women, mothers and fathers, husbands and
wives. We seek a fatherhood movement that, while reaching out to
divorced and unwed fathers, nevertheless discourages divorce and unwed
childbearing and insists upon the importance of marriage as a life goal
worthy of the respect and commitment of young Americans.
We
seek a fatherhood movement that recognizes cultural renewal and
economic opportunity not as opposing ideas, but as two complementary
and essential strategies for one idea: the fatherhood idea.
FOUR
The
fatherhood movement we seek is more than a prediction, more than merely
something that we hope will happen. It is already beginning to happen,
embodied in the pioneering work of devoted leaders and new initiatives
across the country.
Some of our colleagues
focus on fatherhood education and skills training, reaching out
especially to new fathers, teaching them better ways to care for their
children and challenging them to become better men. We are thankful for
their work and seek their leadership in a fatherhood movement.
Some
of our colleagues work for economic empowerment and greater economic
opportunity for young fathers, especially young minority fathers in our
urban centers and other low-income fathers, recognizing that, for many
young men, economic prospects and fatherhood prospects are closely
related and mutually reinforcing. We admire their accomplishments and
seek their leadership for a fatherhood movement.
Some
of our colleagues, rightly appalled by the prevalence of child poverty
in this land of plenty, work to improve the conditions and life
prospects of poor children and their families, recognizing that all
children need fathers who will provide for and nurture them, and that
the spread of fatherlessness in our generation is inextricably linked
to the spread of child poverty. We share their goal and seek their
leadership in a fatherhood movement.
Some
of our colleagues are leaders in efforts to strengthen marriage. Some
are active in efforts to reform no-fault divorce laws, advocating
measures such as extending the waiting periods for divorce, requiring
counseling for troubled marriages, and, in cases of contested divorces,
ending or restricting the unilateral right to divorce on demand. Other
colleagues are leaders in initiatives to improve marriage counseling
and family therapy, urging their fellow professionals to approach their
work with a bias in favor of marriage.
Still
others, working through their houses of worship and guided by the
Biblical premise that "God hates divorce," are leaders in efforts to
improve pastoral counseling for engaged couples, create better
faith-based marital enrichment programs, and establish new
community-wide ecumenical policies aimed at strengthening marriage and
reducing divorce. We are grateful for their work and seek their
leadership for a fatherhood movement.
Many
of our colleagues are women and men of religious faith, reminding us,
in their words and deeds, that being a good father is part of being a
righteous man, and viewing the renewal of fatherhood as one necessary
part of a larger and much-needed spiritual rebirth in our society. Some
of these leaders are active in the Promise Keepers. Others organized
buses to the Million Man March. Others work as leaders in local men's
ministries and other congregational and denominational outreach
efforts. We are thankful for these important leaders, and seek their
leadership in a fatherhood movement.
Some of
our colleagues are community organizers. Some are business leaders.
Some are scholars. Some are philanthropists and foundation officers.
Some are writers and public speakers. Some are active in the
mytho-poetic men's movements. Some are child and family advocates. Some
are leaders in efforts to organize and represent the interests of
divorced fathers who seek to remain active and committed parents. Some
of our colleagues work in the media. Others work primarily with young
people. Still others work in government and in public policy. All of
these leaders have much to contribute. We seek their participation in a
fatherhood movement.
Across
the country, new leaders and new initiatives are emerging. The
potential for real social change exists; the seeds of a movement have
already been planted. The challenge now is to build further on these
inspiring foundations - to deepen our commitment, to grow in wisdom, to
win measurable victories, and to work together in trust and mutual
commitment, striving to create a whole that is greater than the sum of
its parts. The challenge is to ignite a broad-based movement for
fatherhood.
FIVE
In an increasingly fatherless society, we come together to
dedicate ourselves to a proposition: for every child, a loving,
committed and responsible father.
Some
will disagree with this goal. Others, including many experts, will
concede that fathers are important, but will urge us to accept the
current trend of fatherlessness with dispassion and equanimity. Rather
than getting preachy about fatherhood, they will advise us, focus
instead on more realistic solutions. More child support payments from
absent fathers. More support for single mothers. More attempts to find
adequate substitutes for the missing fathers.
While
affirming the importance of reaching out with compassion to single
mothers and fatherless children, this work, although necessary, is not
sufficient. The truth is that the contribution fathers make to the
well-being of children are unique and irreplaceable. Consequently, we
assert that any fatherhood movement worthy of the name must ultimately
be guided by this overriding goal: loving fathers for all our children.
We assert this goal, not because we are unrealistic or lack compassion,
but precisely because we wish to be as realistic and compassionate as
possible.
We
propose to reverse the deterioration of childhood by bringing back the
fathers, for unless we reverse the trend of fatherlessness, we see no
realistic possibility of reversing the current downward spiral for
children. Passivity in the face of this crisis is indefensible. We come
together because we believe that our society can change for the better.
We come together to call for fatherhood.
A
Call to Fatherhood
Published
in 1997 by the Center for the American Experiment, The National
Fatherhood Initiative, and the Institute for American Values.
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