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Taming the Dragons in the Darkness


Most parents at one time or the other have snuggled down in their bed, weary after a long day at work, looking forward to a good night’s sleep only to have their peaceful slumber disturbed by the words, 'Daddy, I’m scared,' or 'Daddy, can I sleep with you?'  You open your eyes to see your toddler standing next to your bed with a scared look on his face. Sometimes, you don’t have any warning before a small body comes diving into the safety of your blanket.

A common problem that most parents face in raising children is that many toddlers and preschoolers often have a fear of sleeping alone in their room. There are monsters in the closet and under the bed. Ghosts, goblins, gremlins and eerie creatures of every size and shape are known to inhabit the bedrooms of young children throughout the world.  The type and size of these unruly critters are limited only by the child’s unbounded imagination.
 
As a parent, your defenses against these wild imaginings are somewhat limited. You drag your tired body from bed and take the child back to his/her room and turn the light on. You show them the room and see that there is nothing to be afraid of. You dig through the contents of the closet and show the child that the inhabitants are their toys, clothes and a little dust. You get the flashlight and shine it under the bed from all angles to show that there is nothing lurking in the darkness. You reassure your little one that the room is safe and secure and free of any kind abnormal force that is a threat to them. You tuck the child into bed, kiss them good night and drag your tired body back to bed. As you are beginning to doze you once again hear the words, 'Daddy, I’m scared.'

After several nights of interrupted sleep you decide something has to be done. The frequent visits by the child in the middle of the night are beginning to take its toll. Your work is beginning to suffer because of sleep deprivation, and you don’t even want to look in the mirror in the morning because of the bags under your eyes. It’s time for a night light. After work, you load the little one into the car and head to the local department store and show him a variety of lights. You pick out one that features his favorite super hero. When you get home you plug the light into the wall outlet. He is happy to have the light with the super hero and you are looking forward to a long-awaited good nights sleep. Unfortunately, that night is like all the others. He is awake, looking for the monster to appear in the light. Before long the child is standing next to your bed again.

An idea that worked with one three-year old, although it may not work with all toddlers, involves a little work but in the end the results were worth it. Alana, was a three year-old who had an intense fear of all those scary monsters under her bed. Every night she would crawl into her parents’ bed in order to escape that frightful situation. All of the reassuring approaches as well as the night lights were used without success. Finally, out of desperation, her father came up with an idea. Dad took Alana to the local hardware store. They headed to the paint department where he asked Alana to pick out her favorite color. She quickly selected sky blue. Dad pulled a small can of the blue paint from the shelf and held it low to where Alana could watch as Dad supposedly read from the back of the can. 'If you paint the trim in your bedroom with this paint it will keep out all monsters, ghosts, goblins and any other kinds of creatures. As long as your room has this paint on the trim monsters will never be able to enter your room.'  Dad pointed to the print on the back of the can as he read to Alana. She smiled happily and they went home to paint the trim in her bedroom the pretty sky blue that she liked. After the painting was finished Dad read the directions to Alana once again. That night she slept peacefully knowing that the monsters could not cross the painted barrier. Dad slept peacefully, too.


Jackie Paxton, Ed.D. is an Associate Professor of Education at Arkansas Tech University. He has presented several hundred workshops on learning problems, attention deficit disorder and behavioral disorders. He has also written several articles dealing with parenting issues. He may be reached at or .
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