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Family Cross Culture Communication |
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Written by Thim Liew
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Ever thought how difficult it is to communicate with children from
different fathers? Look at me! I have to communicate with
my two elder children who were brought up with different values.
They know that they are different. They feel different and they
look different. My wife's genes were not too dominant. So,
is there a way out?
I recently took the cue from a brain researcher and decided to profile
them. What an insight. I discovered that they can be easily
categorized into 4 basic selves. This profiling allowed me to undestand
how my 4 children communicated or mis-cmmunicated to each other. So,
armed with this new discovery, I ordered a weekly meeting.
At this meeting, I virtually cajole everyone to participate. My
role was just that of a facilitator. We rotated the position of
the chairperson at every other meeting. Every member of the
family, that included my step-ones; were allowed to air their
grievances. Each member was also allowed to praise something good
about the other member of the family. At last week's meeting, the
elder sister thanked the youngest brother for arranging her room to
that of a neat and tidy room. That was an achievement for my 8
year old son. Normally, he would like to mess thing up and get
into everyone's nerves. But, he had received such an
encouragement from his step-sister that he had volunteered to do that
same favour again, for following week.
So, I am delighted that this kind of weekly meeting has turned out
something positive. Why don't you fathers out there give it a
try. No harm just sitting everyone at the family room and holding
a friendly ‘pow-wow' with no TV, no computer games or food. Just
plain word of mouth communication.
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